The Saturday Scalpel: Issue 22

From the desk of Dr. Kevin, MD

"I’d like to call it refined gas station goop"

Hello, Goodmorning, etc.

It’s Saturday Scalpel time… and your boi Kev is back with a Skincare Special…

Because why the hell not?!

Now, I have so many dermatologist friends, and you know what skincare ingredient they actually use?

No, it’s not the $187 snake venom serum with “anti-aging moon extract.”

It’s Vaseline. (No, I’m not sponsored, Karen!)

Yes, that greasy tub of white petrolatum you saw next to your grandma’s dentures.

And if you’re thinking “ew, isn’t that, like, motor oil for your pores?”

Congratulations, you’ve been successfully fear-mongered by Instagram wellness influencers who exfoliate with Himalayan salt and shame you for breathing city air.

Let’s correct that.